Nocturnal meanderings or Minister for transport (copy)

Nocturnal meanderings

I have just purchased a paper shredder.  It was kind of an impulse buy resulting from an email from Tesco.  I have been meaning to buy a new one for ages as our small, plastic, manual model gave up and died a while back.  Anyway this one was a bargain.  Originally £40, reduced to £25 then again to £17 and finally £12 as an internet purchase with free postage.
I ordered one and it was delivered 2 days later.  It is a fine specimen and well worth the money.  You would think that would be the end of the story wouldn’t you?  Unpackage it, decide where it will live and put it away ready for when it’s needed.  I did that.
Then at 3am in the morning when as usual my mind was going over lots of stuff and refusing to shut up and go to sleep; I started to think about my paper shredder.
What a strange world we live in now.  Only 20 years ago paper shredders were things that you had in your office at work.  Nobody would have ever dreamt about having one at home.  Unfortunately with the ever present threat of identity fraud the paper shredder has now become almost a household necessity.
I then moved on in my befuddled sleepy brain to think about how Tesco can do internet sales so cheaply.  You would think that if anything it would cost more because of the transportation costs.  This led me on to thinking about our shopping habits today and how, maybe, internet shopping contributes to the congestion on our roads!
I think weird stuff in the middle of the night!
Think about it for a minute though……in the good old days of the corner shop and the High Street you didn’t need a car.  You could walk to the corner shop, maybe even to the High Street.  If the High Street was a bit too far for walking there was always the bus.  Now you need a car to get to your local “Retail park” some 6 or so miles away. (Why do buses never seem to go to retail parks?)  Or the alternative is,  you stay at home and use your trusty computer to order your goods via the internet.  They are then delivered direct to you door in either a van or a great big lorry depending on the size of your order.  This must mean that there are lots more Lorries and vans on the road delivering all of our orders.
SO………..if you order goods on the internet for home delivery then you are inadvertently adding to the country’s gridlocked roads!  Makes sense to me. 
At 4am, I realised that I know how to sort out this country’s problems with roads and transport.  We close all the retail parks and shut down the World Wide Web (at least for shopping) then we bring back the corner shop and the long lost High Streets and we all walk everywhere.  No need then for so many Lorries to be thundering along our roads.  I am a genius!  Move over Mr Blair and whoever is the Government Minister for transport.
At about 4.30am, before finally managing to still my over active brain long enough to doze off, I had 1 final thought………………………………
Why are they called “Retail parks”?   Isn’t a park a place with grass and trees where people go for leisure? 
4.37am. Got it!  They are called Retail parks because retail therapy is the new leisure activity of choice!
5am. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz